quotes for those of us with an anxious attachment style
Living with an anxious attachment style is difficult because you’re stressed, overthinking and constantly worried about the relationship you have with someone who may not be fulfilling your emotional needs.
My ex, who I’ve been on-and-off again seeing, is an avoidant. And our attachment styles have clashed so many times, that I think that’s what led to our demise.
It’s not impossible to date someone with a different attachment style from you, but it takes a lot of work.
Your partner has to be willing to work with you and find a middle ground for both of you, when disagreements or emotional hardships pop up.
And you, as difficult as it is, have to find a way to manage your anxiety when it comes to this person. While your partner needs to be reassuring and make you feel comfortable, you should also do the work to heal your inner trauma.
If the anxiety is becoming too much, you also have to think about if this person is the right person for you. Is this person constantly triggering you, and are those triggers something you want to live with?
If you’re struggling with your anxious attachment style and looking for inspiration for what to do in your current situation, keep these quotes in mind.
anxious attachment style quotes:
“If you are in love with someone who doesn’t love you back the way you need and loving them more only results in you completely losing yourself, the most profound lesson lies in letting go and realizing that love alone is not enough.”
― Jessica Baum
“I think about you all the time. I hear your voice in my head, I rehearse conversations with you, I talk to myself, and imagine I’m talking to you. And I wish you felt like this about me, but I know you don’t and I don’t think you ever will.”
― Eliza Clark
“Time is the ultimate proof of a promise to change.”
― John Van Epp
“The key to finding a mate who can fulfill those needs is to first fully acknowledge your need for intimacy, availability, and security in a relationship - and to believe that they are legitimate.”
― Amir Levine & Rachel S.F. Heller
“We must remain open to possible failure in relationships if we want to experience deep connection with another person… Relationship anxiety is just part of being alive."
― Dr. Stan Tatkin
“Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create.”
― Roy T. Bennett
“All hurt is founded on attachment to anything regardless of its nature. When we detach we vibrationally send ourselves back into the flow of life.”
― Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana
“As we familiarize ourself more with secure attachment, our relationships become easier and more rewarding – we’re less reactive, more receptive, more available for connection, healthier, and much more likely to bring out the securely attached tendencies in others.”
― Diane Poole Heller
“Remember, there’s no greatness in the future. Or clarity. Or insight. Or happiness. Or peace. There is only this moment.”
― Ryan Holiday
“Stop romanticizing emotional unavailability. It’s not mystery. It’s absence.”
― Lina Bloom
“It’s important to understand that attachment-related anxiety does not have to be in response to any obviously abusive or harmful parenting; in fact, it most often is not. Many people with attachment-related anxiety come from very loving homes.”
― Leslie Becker-Phelps
“Those of us who are anxiously attached have a particular vulnerability. Everybody could feel a little bit avoidant to us.”
― Jessica Baum
