how to handle feeling incompetent at work
It feels like my boss hates my work. She’s constantly changing, editing and fixing things I do, which makes me feel incompetent and dumb.
I should be used to it, but it doesn’t feel good or make me feel like I’m a helpful member of the team. I always feel worse about myself and vulnerable letting her see my work.
Feeling incompetent at work can negatively impact your self worth, leave you feeling like you don’t belong, exacerbate imposter syndrome
It’s everyone’s first time doing life. Don’t beat yourself up for mistakes or negative criticism at work.
Give yourself grace, and remember that humans make mistakes. No one’s perfect, and it’s not fair to hold yourself to unrealistic standards.
Allow yourself a grace period when starting a new job, fight feelings of imposter syndrome and stop tying your self worth to productivity when you start to feel incompetent at work.
allow yourself a grace period when starting a new job
It’s completely normal to feel unprepared in a new position, or like you don’t know what you’re doing at a new job.
My go-to amount of time I tell people to let yourself be a newbie is 6 months to a year. It takes me about that amount of time to get truly comfortable in a new position.
If you’re rushing to be this perfect employee during week one, you’re going to leave room for extra disappointment and self criticism. It’s not fair to yourself to compare your work and success to someone else who has been doing this for way longer than you.
“I am not the richest, smartest or most talented person in the world, but I succeed because I keep going and going and going.”
— Sylvester Stallone
There’s also company culture, unique lingo and different technology and systems you’ll have to learn beyond your main tasks and responsibilities.
No one is expecting you to be perfect on day one (or even month one). Make all the mistakes, and ask all the questions you can while your boss and coworkers are willing to do what they can to help you succeed.
While you’re in this new period of starting a position, you are not only trying to learn everything and be a great employee. You should also be doing some self reflection on if you even like this job, if it’s the right move, if you feel supported by your co-workers, etc.
read more dealing with job rejection quotes.
fight feelings of imposter syndrome
Imposter syndrome is an ugly feeling that has negatively affected my own sense of worth and made me feel like I didn’t belong at a job.
“Imposter syndrome is a persistent feeling that you don't deserve your success and that you'll eventually be exposed as a fraud, despite clear evidence of your abilities and hard work,” according to Verywell Mind.
The organization said entering a new role can trigger imposter syndrome, and it appears to be more common during transitions or times when people are trying new things.
“The pressure to achieve and succeed, combined with a lack of experience, can trigger feelings of inadequacy in these new roles and settings,” they wrote.
Reminding myself of my own achievements and acknowledging moments when I’ve made it through challenging tasks and rough professional moments have helped me fight imposter syndrome the most.
“Without experiencing criticism and rejection in life, it would be impossible to grow or improve yourself.”
― Mwanandeke Kindembo
It’s crucial to refresh your memory of why you belong in a certain room. You’re more than worthy of being around other successful people you admire. You’re more than capable of doing hard things at work and succeeding through things you didn’t think you could.
additional content: the struggle of self worth when feeling undervalued at work
stop tying your self worth to productivity
Feeling inadequate at work can sometimes come after severe criticism or a bad week at work. But you have to remember it doesn’t define you as a whole.
There will be high and low moments of progress. You’ll be able to accomplish more some days, and the other days you may need time to go slow.
There’s a balance when it comes to productivity and success, and it’s completely unfair to allow for low moments to dictate how you feel about yourself and your self worth.
You are way more than what you accomplish on a given day, week, month, year, etc. Your self worth shouldn’t be tied to how productive or successful you are. This world is way bigger than a career and way bigger than achievements.
A fear of failure can also make you not even want to start. There’s so many times that I’ve been left feeling anxious and like I didn’t want to start a task or project at all because of the what ifs.
“Just because you fail once doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything.”
― Marilyn Monroe
Try to be proud of the steps along the way. Make mini goals or objectives that can allow you to feel good about yourself and your journey. The outcome is obviously the larger goal, and we all want to achieve greatness.
additional content: how to stop tying your self worth to productivity
reflection time
What situation recently made me feel incompetent, and what specifically triggered that feeling?
What assumptions am I making about how others perceive my performance?
What skills am I still learning that take time to develop?
What part of my job do I actually do well, even if I overlook it?
What feedback have I received that contradicts the idea that I’m incompetent?
What would progress look like instead of perfection?
What questions could I ask that would help me grow in this role?
What is one mistake I made that taught me something valuable?
